Monday, March 1, 2010

Structure Assignment...

----Rant of the Shampoo Bottle------

Just lather, rinse, repeat
And your sex
Will surface.
Our fortifying formula
Washes all your flaws away.

Awkward? Acne?
You’ve never looked so sexy.
Yellow teeth, bloodshot eyes.
You’ve never felt this good.

Scrub. Massage. Fingertips.
Rub. Bubble. Work.
Squeeze. Strengthen. Thoroughly.
Your sex
Will surface.

And all
It takes
Is hair.
One shower, rinse, repeat.

100% some-toxin-other-than-your-own-green-smoky-toejam-breath
FREE
Money back-if-you’re-ever-confident-enough-to-bargain-with-a-sales-clerk-or-dial-a-1800-number SATISFACTION GUARANTEE
Inactive Ingredients: Fried dough, Juicy track suit, a high school degree rotting underneath a potato shaped couch.

Warning: Can cause irritation. Side-effects may include a decreased perception of reality, obsessive compulsive disorder, indigestion,
and hair loss. All animals used in testing this product turned out OK.

MADE IN USA

1 comment:

Natalie Jane said...

you were born to be in a creative writing class. obviously.