Hypochondria?

I have a confession to make. I don't believe in gluten intolerance.

Let me rephrase.

I was born to a Nurse Mom. Which means that instead of lavish dance competitions my childhood was filled with the excitement of little to no sympathy for ailments. Barfing your Froot Loops? Go to school. Snot rockets for days? Keep your chin up! Chicken pox? FINALLY! Etc.

I am consequently under the (probably false) assumption that my mom knows more about health issues than your mom, and so when she tells me that so and so is probably just getting tested for fibromyalgia because they want attention...I tend to believe her.

Which leads me to gluten. Call me crazy, but I feel like gluten allergies are SO IN right now. It seems like it's "the thing" lately to be allergic to anything that tastes normal! I don't know if I buy it. Yes, I understand the 50 year old man who humbly cannot take the sacrament on Sunday because he is gluten intolerant, or sure, the skin and bone skinny girl from my freshman ward who made potato pancakes regularly...
But I don't understand how so many people now are just deciding that they can't eat wheat products these days!

It got me to thinking about my own eating habits. I wonder if there's any way I could justify claiming that I have a food allergy. For example. Every time I go to Cafe Rio I get the runs. Every single time. Does this mean I'm allergic to Cafe Rio? Maybe. Am I going to start telling everyone I know that I can't eat there because I'm intolerant? NO. HE-DOUBLE-HOCKEY-STICKS NO.

I'm sorry if you really do have this disease and you've struggled with it for years...but if one day you thought to yourself "Hm. I get diarrhea too often" and diagnosed yourself with a gluten intolerance/allergy/whatever...?

I have no sympathy for you. Maybe you just need to eat more vegetables and fruit and exercise or something!

I don't know. I'm no doctor. Just know that my mom is a nurse. So to you attention seekers out there I say, GO TO SCHOOL YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE A FEVER, EMILY.